Operation Maximus Springus

It's official, we are now a family of four.  Yesterday we had our long-awaited court date.  Our driver picked us up from the Vlad Motor Inn at 8:30 am and we survived the drive into downtown Vladivostok to the courthouse.  It is one of the few buildings we've seen since our arrival that has actually been recently painted — on the outside.  Apparently, in preparation for next year's APEC Conference, many public buildings are getting a fresh look.  But, like I said, only on the outside.


Our coordinator was in charge of looking after Evan during our court session.  Prior to sending Evan off with Ivan, I had Jose take Evan to use the bathroom.  Next I took my turn since I knew that we could possibly be in court for two hours.  When I returned to the courtroom to await the judges arrival, I mentioned to Jose, "you could have told me I needed to bring my own toilet paper and hand towel."  I had forgotten about this piece of advice I read somewhere before our first trip back in February.  Most public bathrooms are sorely lacking in basic bathroom necessities including paper products and even toilet seats.  Yuck.  


Our judge arrived in the courtroom at 10:05 am.  There were eight of us total, all women except for Jose.  It was a very serious proceeding that for some reason equalled nearly three hours of questions from both the judge and the prosecutor.  The judge wanted to hear from Jose first.  After his hour of questions, it was my turn.  I'll attempt to make another post with some of the questions we were asked.  I found it quite interesting, actually, to entertain their questions of choice.  It almost felt as if some of the questions were purely out of foreign curiosity about our lives.  They wanted to know who took care of the house, the garden, who cut the yard, how mortgages work in the US..., if Jose teaches Evan "manly jobs, like using tools."  I had to prevent myself from laughing at some of the questions.  But like I said, more on that in another post.


Somewhere around 12:45 pm, it was pronounced that everyone was in agreement that we should be Maxim's parents.  We were ecstatic, tired, and hungry.  After that, we stopped at a toy store on the way back to the hotel so that we could pick up a few extra "gifts" for the children's home.  We also learned, en route, that Ivan had spoken with the orphanage director and had received permission for us to pick up Maxim the next day.


Well that next day was today. It's nearly 9:30 pm our time and we're exhausted.  We left the hotel at 9:00 am this morning to go to the orphanage.  It was a complete surprise to Maxim since when we left him last, we told him we'd be back Monday to see him.  Being able to pick up the child the day after court is not a common thing.  There's a mandatory 10 day waiting period after the declaration before you can even begin processing the visa for them to enter your own country.  Maxim will have dual citizenship until the age of 18, but that doesn't begin until we touch soil in the US.  It is up to the director of each orphanage as to when they allow the parents to receive the adopted child.  Many have to wait the entire 10 days.  This trip, we've met several other couples who have gotten their child "early."  

Evan & Max on the drive to the hotel.

So back to our day with Maxim.  At first he was happy to see us, but then got very sad when the bags of toys we had brought with us were carried away and into the children's home.  Apparently he expected that they were for him since each time we visited, we brought something special for him in our bag.  It took him a while to warm up to us again and his caretaker had to explain to him that he was going with us.  Since it was Saturday, many of the kids of all ages were playing outside.  His caretaker allowed us to take a group photo of Maxim and all his friends.  We wanted him to have this to remember where he came from.  I wish I could post it here for you all, but I am extremely certain that it would be frowned upon.  I can't even tell you the emotions that I encountered marching up the long walk to the car, with about a dozen of Maxim's friends in tow, Maxim being carried by Jose, Evan alongside, and myself behind with two adorable girls, each holding one of my hands.  They were so excited just to learn that Maxim was getting to leave in a car.  (MA sheen a .... like Machine with an A at the end)  It was impossible to ignore that Maxim was the envy of nearly every child there today.  I had to steel myself attempting not to cry.  I didn't do very well. I know in my heart that we've done so much just to make this adoption happen.  When I left that children's home today, it just didn't feel like very much at all, leaving some eighty kids there behind.  I so wish every child there would have a family step up to take them home.  


I think it was on the drive back to the hotel when the realization hit — we had no idea how to communicate with this little being.  He is a jabber mouth at 4 and 1/2 years old and  I understand maybe one word out of 100.  I had to remind myself to not freak out, just to take today one minute at a time and deal with the now.  It's simple to get perfectly out of control if you start to focus on an entire day or week of how you will handle everything.  I was grateful for having read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.  

Maxim in the Park... Happy Boy.

The first thing we did upon getting back to the hotel was throw him into the bathtub.  What's bizarre is that just a bath and a new set of clothes can provide a new fresh outlook for one of these little children.  We were lucky, he loves to play in the tub.  So it appears that bath time will not be an issue.  After that, we served up some yogurts and apple slices for the boys.  Another success, although Maxim didn't seem to care for peanut butter with his apple.  After that, we walked outside the hotel and around the back to the beautiful little playground.  He did wonderfully and only ran off about three times.  That is going to be our challenge... to get him to understand that he needs to come when he is called and that it's not ok for him to wander off on his own.  Evan was such a terrific brother today, he helped us keep Max close (almost like a sheep herding dog), and they also had a great time on the teeter totter.  Evan was so happy to finally have someone to teeter totter with.  That weight and balance just doesn't work so well with your parents on the other end.  

Evan, Max & Jose next to the Sea of Japan

Next we came back to our room for lunch (we've been moved into a "suite" with a kitchen).  This kid is going to have no problems with food.  I made macaroni just because it was what he said was his favorite.  We bought a jar of tomato sauce and it worked just fine for italian sauce.  After lunch we watched  a Sesame Street video on the computer, then headed out for a walk down in the park that's on the Sea of Japan.  The boys got to go in a bounce house, throw rocks into the ocean and then enjoy an ice cream.  It was a successful outing with not too many attempts at running off.  Upon returning to the hotel, we learned that we have to watch Maxim like a hawk whenever he gets near the front door of our room... he wants to be an escapee.  Even tonight, after we put the boys in bed, we caught Maxim trying to sneak out the locked door.  I'm not sure we'll be sleeping a lot tonight.  I hope he doesn't run off.


Anyway... I'm signing off now before I start sleeping on the keyboard.  More tomorrow if I can summon some energy.  Life is good.